“Ah, the Ohio climate; there’s just no better weather,” said no one. Ever.

Seriously.

To prove my disapproval of our environmental environment, I went to the experts at www.weatheratlas.com . Here’s the 4-1-1 on our funny forecast foray from the big brains running said website:

“Ohio has a humid continental type of climate (Koppen climate classification Dfa, Dfb) in much of the state and a humid subtropical climate (Koppen Cfa) in the extreme south.”

Um, who the heck is Koppen and what on earth are Df a’s and b’s? Hmm.

“The warmth increases from north to south regions, with typically hot summers and cold winters. Ohio lies in the Great Lakes region of North America. The high latitudes, lack of high mountain ranges and proximity to the Great Lakes are major players that dominate the climate.”

Well, duh. Now for more deets on our home sweet hometown:

l Ohio has an average elevation of 260 meters above sea level, with the highest point at Campbell Hill in Bellefontaine, northwest Ohio, at 1,549.09 feet;

l Lake Erie defines much of the northern border and provides the state with more than 300 miles of the coast;

l The Ohio River forms the southern border;

l The northern part of Ohio drains into the north Atlantic Ocean, while the southern part drains into the Gulf of Mexico.

Speaking of the lattermost, I’d much rather be there than in the Buckeye state, just sayin’.

“Summers are hot and humid in Ohio, with average high temperatures rising to 90 degrees (32.2 degrees Celsius) at the peak of July. Winters are cold and verge on being bitter, while autumn has cloudy skies but pleasant temperatures and less rain.”

Grr. Bitter, indeed.

Apparently, the average annual rainfall in Ohio is 38 inches and occurs throughout the year. Cyclones contribute to the rainfall from October to March, while thunderstorms are significant contributors during the rest of the year.

Cyclones?

The average monthly rainfall is between 2 to 5 inches, with October the driest and April the wettest. The relative humidity level throughout the year is 75 percent.

Natch.

“September and October are prone to dense fog, as is January, with visibility under one-fourth of a mile. Ohio receives 2,200 hours of sunshine annually.”

2200 hours. That’s the equivalent of 91.7 days. Out of 365.

It seems the best time to visit Ohio is in the fall season from September to October when the “temperatures are pleasant, and the rainfall is less.”

Seems there is “ample sunlight” (according to whom, exactly?) and the day temperatures are in the comfortable 60 to 80 degrees.

Also, quick travel tip: All vacation packages appear to be budget-friendly in the summer.

Now for the bad news, though it comes as no surprise.

“The worst time to visit Ohio is during the winter season from December to February when severe cold holds its grip on the state. The northern regions are colder than the south, and night temperatures often drop below 0 degrees Fahrenheit. Polar air masses invade from the north and penetrate even the south. Snowstorms are frequent in the winter, with lake effect snow in the coastal areas of Lake Erie.”

Tsk and hmpf.

Also, Ohio is vulnerable to thunderstorms, floods, earthquakes, tornadoes, cyclones, and snowstorms.

There you have it, weather fans. Join me in a flight to Cabo, anyone?

Kimerer is a columnist who thinks Ohio weather is for buckeyes alone. Send good weather forecasts her way at pkimerer@zoominternet.net.